Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Feeling Mellow Today

For about a year, I have been taking 0.5 mg of Klonopin at bedtime to deal with my anxety disorder. I am also allowed to take 0.5 as needed, but barely ever do that anymore. This is an extremely low dose. Many people take up to a prescribed 3.0 mg a day.
I also take a lot of other meds and supplements so I fill my four pillboxes once a week. Well, the last time I filled them, I apparently skipped putting the Klonopin in my bedtime box because I hadn't refilled it. That was a few days ago. I went three or four bedtimes without it and without realizing it until last night when I looked at the pills in my hand to make sure I hadn't dropped a pill. It wasn't in my hand, but I hadn't dropped it and it wasn't in the rest of the box either.
Now, this is interesting to me because I did not know I wasn't taking it, but I was starting to feel really anxious and angry the past few days without knowing why. this wasn't withdrawal--I've gone through that before with other psych meds and it feels like a flu. I did not feel sick at all, just anxious and angry.
So now I realize this little bit of anxiolytic is actually helping me a great deal, and it is not just a placebo effect. Because I feel so serene today. Not jittery or angry or anxious at all.
Drugs are good for you. And I will keep telling myself that with every handful I take.
This happened to me with my Plaquenil about 6 years back. I felt better so I stopped taking it. I spiralled into a flare so fast my head spun. My doctor scolded me, put me back on it and it has helped me so much. I have been on the same dose for about eight or ten years now.
That is one thing about my body: I seem to respond quickly and fully to new drugs whether for the better or the side effects and know whether or not it is a good choice for me. And I am able to maintain doses over years and years instead of having to increase doses like many people. That's one good thing about a sensitive sytem, I guess.
The bad side of a sensitive system is played out by my IBS. I leave that to your imagination for now, but let's just say it has been a rough few days on my gut for some reason. Hmmmm... maybe the anxiety I was starting to have messed it up so thoroughly? It is one of the biggest influences on IBS.


Anonymous said...

Oh, yeah....anxiety will kick up the IBS before you even know you are feeling anxious.
When I worked as a psych nurse we had a very high percentage of patients that, if they had stayed on their meds, would have been fine. But, they felt better, stopped the meds and..voila!, back to the hospital!
I've also played with my meds with similar results....went months without my asthma meds, slowly having more problems with being short of breath...I'm never going off them again!
Glad you are feeling better!

Historical Wit said...

I have a sensitivity to meds too. Well all drugs actually. Like 2 beers and I feel what looks like 4 beers to others. I can get a buzz off tylenol. Hell even the 600 mg motrins buzz me. Don't even start with pot. That crap puts me in a coma. I get stoned from contact smoke. And sometimes I think thats crazy, but then I see many people chase a buzz. Got to drink more to get where they were or smoke more, or eat more pills, you get the picture. And it doens't always turn out good. So in my middle age, I am glad that all I need for a good buzz is 2 beers. Or a couple glasses of wine. If I had to stick to one alcohol drink for the rest of my life, it would be red wine. What really sucks is in the summer I love to drink wine. LOVE IT. But in the last year, when I try to drink wine I get these intense headaches. I think I am having a reaction to preservatives. My sister does. Thats why I stick to Miller or guinness. No preservatives. Alright, got to finish reading the rest of your blog and this coffee brake is running short...

kaylynuke said...

Historical Wit: It's the sulfites, most likely. There are many sulfite-free wines--even organic ones--that are fairly inexpensive: $10-$15 usually.

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